What is up with Mother Nature? Does she hate us? Taunting us with a glimpse of spring-like weather and then slamming us with a snow storm? Well I'm pissed off at her..................................she is going down.

She is so cute I'd like to take her by the hair and toss her face first into a snow bank. I will then grab a nearby icicle and give her a good crack across the back of the head. I will put her on a plane, fly her to Jamaica and as I stuff her face with fistfuls of sand, I will explain to her that this climate would work much better for us New England folks. For the finale, I will torch the bitch.

Hey, she gives us extreme cold, we will give her extreme heat........................Just say'n

The J-Walker

We all know about the J-Walker. They are everywhere! Scattering on the busy streets of Boston like little ants running for that cracker crumb on the sidewalk. They are annoying, and must be stopped!

First, I will find a large truck with a plow on it. I will then drive down the busy streets of Boston taking care not to stop for anyone who jumps in my path. I will stop at the last victim, and drag him to the side of the road where I will take of his sneakers and use the laces to tie his limp body to the stop sign. I will then repeatedly punch him in the face, until he resembles the red hexagon shaped apparatus that he is strapped to. Then I will put on a sexy cop uniform and give him a ticket.

That will be the last J-Walker you ever see in my town!