The Chain Smoker

I am the first to admit, nothing is sexier than ending a night of partying by kissing a HOT man who has just enough essence of smoke and booze on his breath. Social smoking is quite popular, and in my mind, I don't see anything wrong with indulging in that. However, I still don't understand how people can smoke on a daily basis.

I don't have any addictions (other than food........and shopping........and sex) Ok, I don't have any that are actually hazardous to my health. How is it that we are well educated about the effects of smoking, yet people still smoke 1-2 packs a day?
Do you like your lungs? Do you want to talk through a voice box? You like smelling like an ashtray?

Your so cute I want to take your pack of Marlboro Menthols and break all of them in half in front of you. Then I will take a box of nicotine patches and stick all of them to your body. While you are experiencing overdose signs including dizziness, upset stomach, bad headaches, vomiting, cold sweats, drooling, confusion, blurred vision, hearing problems, weakness or fainting, I will simultaneously be beating you over the head with your lighter and the inhaler you will eventually need. Once i'm finished, I will sit an lecture you on the effects of smoking while flipping through pictures of burnt lungs and the Crypt keeper, cause that's who you will eventually look, and smell like...........dumb assess.